[Happy 35th Birthday!] Star Trek: The Motion Picture (1979)

Director: Robert Wise

Cast: William Shatner, Leonard Nimoy, DeForest Kelley, James Doohan, Walter Koenig, Nichelle Nichols, George Takei, Persis Khambatta, Stephen Collins

Screenplay: Harold Livingston

132 mins. Rated PG for sci-fi action and mild language.

Academy Award Nominee: Best Art Direction – Set Direction
Academy Award Nominee: Best Effects – Visual Effects
Academy Award Nominee: Best Music, Original Score

When Firefly was cancelled prematurely, fans fought hard to have their show brought back in any way, shape, or form. Eventually, the powers that be granted us Serenity. People tend to forget that the same thing happened on an even grander scale over twenty years prior when Star Trek, about a five-year mission into space, ended abruptly after only three seasons. When, many years later, the idea came about to resurrect the Enterprise for a feature film, fans were ecstatic. If only they knew. If only they knew…

Star Trek: The Motion Picture picks up with the completion of the Enterprise’s five-year mission. Several members of the crew have gone on to other work. That is, until a mysterious presence in deep space in a massive cloud of energy destroys several Klingon ships and has its sights set for Earth. Recently promoted Admiral James T. Kirk (William Shatner, TV’s $#*! My Dad Says, Escape from Planet Earth) takes over command of the Enterprise from its new Captain Decker (Stephen Collins, TV’s 7^th Heaven, The Three Stooges) and joins up with Spock (Leonard Nimoy, Transformers: Dark of the Moon, Land of the Lost) and the rest of the crew to discover its origins and, if need be, destroy it.

Star Trek: The Motion Picture was put together with one big mistake. It tries to be two things. It tries to stretch out its television show length without adding enough in, and it tries to be 2001: A Space Odyssey. It tries and fails. This movie is a mess. I feel as though screenwriter Harold Livingston didn’t know enough about the series to craft a meaningful new chapter. I feel as though Gene Roddenberry was unwittingly burying his work under layers of convolution. I feel as though Robert Wise (The Sound of Music, West Side Story) didn’t understand what he was doing.

The cast performs admirably, and there isn’t a whole lot of issue to be had with the cinematography. What really kills this film is the editing and pacing of it all. My God, it just doesn’t end! I think they finished this film 35 years ago and that’s how long I’ve been watching it! There are sequences, like Spock’s infamous spacewalk, that are meant to build tension but just end up pooping out on trying to be spectacular.

The score here is pretty sweet, and serves to invigorate the series for future installments, but it does little to invigorate this tale.

And what’s the deal with those costumes? My girlfriend said it best. It looks like these characters are heading to a Star Trek-themed sleepover and are wearing their pajamas. Terrible look, which was thankfully rectified for the sequels.

All in all, Star Trek: The Motion Picture gave us Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, and in that way, I am grateful. Unfortunately, it also gave us Star Trek: The Motion Picture, and in that way, I am angry. This is an entry which does nothing to enhance the series it is in. Best to just skip to Khan.

1.5/5

-Kyle A. Goethe

December 7, 2014 4

[Happy 20th Birthday!] Trapped in Paradise (1994)

Director: George Gallo

Cast: Nicolas Cage, Jon Lovitz, Dana Carvey

Screenplay: George Gallo

111 mins. Rated PG-13 for some rude language.

Christmas is just around the corner, so I thought it fitting to jump into the Christmas spirit by talking about a classic (at least on Comedy Central) that came to screens twenty years ago today. I’m talking about a little black comedy called Trapped in Paradise. It stars Nicolas Cage (Leaving Las Vegas, Left Behind) as Bill Firpo, the rightest of the three Firpo brothers, and the only one who can mostly ignore his temptations to commit crimes. His brothers Dave (Jon Lovitz, Happiness, Grown Ups 2) and Alvin (Dana Carvey, Wayne’s World, Jack and Jill) cannot ignore theirs, and are being released from prison due to overcrowding. Bill is begged by his paroled brethren to head to Paradise, Pennsylvania to visit the daughter of an incarcerated friend and ask her to visit her dying father. Bill eventually goes along, and for reason, he is most easily convinced to commit a bank robbery. The bank robbery goes somewhat awry, and the boys are now stuck in the town to a sweltering blizzard hitting town. They must survive being trapped in Paradise. See what I did there?

Nicolas Cage is just terrible here. He yells and screams and Cages everything in sight. His is one of the most unlikable performances in his career. He thankfully gets outshined by Lovitz and Carvey who provide a few laughs and have good chemistry, but altogether become more of a chorus than active members of the family. They provide a hokey commentary on the events going on without really bearing much weight on the story.

And what’s the deal with this bank robbery? Cage’s character Bill spends most of the film trying to keep his brothers from committing petty theft before being easily swayed into robbing a bank? C’MON! Totally unbelievable and uninspired. Prove it to me, unheard of director George Gallo! Prove it!

I enjoyed some of the tertiary characters in this film. They play as caricatures of picturesque small-town people. If the film were set a bit more to the west, I could call it Minnesota Nice to the extreme.

Director Gallo (Middle Men, Double Take) sleeps through this film. I didn’t find myself swept up in any of the events of the film. His screenplay offers far too few laughs and far too much fluff (and this isn’t good fluff, it is crap covered fluff). Even the cast in the film looks like it isn’t having any fun in this “funny Christmas” film. They referred to it as “Trapped in Bullshit” for the entirety of the strained shoot, and it shows here.

Part of me is drawn to Trapped in Paradise once every couple years, and when I finish it, I’m still not sure why. The film is dark and unfunny, it isn’t beautifully shot or acted, and it isn’t a plot that I can connect to in the slightest. This film exists somewhere above the Hallmark film releases but dreadfully below most anything else.

1.5/5

-Kyle A. Goethe

December 2, 2014 0

31 Days of Horror – Extra Bits: [Take 5] Horror Musicals!

Hey everyone, well, October is well upon us, and for my first entry in the 31 Days of Horror, I talked about a horror musical called The Devil’s Carnival. As you might recall, I didn’t love it, but it got me intrigued about horror musicals. I know they can be pulled off, I have seen some pretty fierce ones and they can ride that line of camp or darkness or sometimes both. So, today, I’m starting a new feature called Take 5, where I give you a list of five movies that are horror musicals. Now, this is not a list of the only five horror musicals ever. It is also not a countdown, but merely five movies that I’m trying to bring to public knowledge more. The idea came from a casual reader that asked me about marathoning movies for Halloween, and I thought back to a weekly movie night I hosted at my home, and one night we did a horror musical night, and all the horror musicals listed here were up for contention. So, I’m not going to drag that out much longer and just present you with this week’s Take 5!

Take 5 Horror Musicals:

The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)

(Dir: Henry Selick)

Nominated for Best Visual Effects (1994 Academy Awards)

Now, I want to exclaim this right now. I haven’t seen this movie in a number of years. To be honest, I have always respected it, but it just never got me like it got so many.

The Nightmare Before Christmas is the story of Jack Skellington (Chris Sarandon) who lives in “Halloween Town” and ends up finding his way out through a doorway leading to a mystical forest of sorts. Spotting another doorway and entering through it, Jack finds himself in “Christmas Town” and decides to celebrate this newly discovered world. It features some absolutely powerful music (this is music that gets stuck in your head, even when you don’t know any of the lyrics, and you just can’t stop singing them) as well as some wholly terrifying voice work from the stop-motion characters. I want to point out that Tim Burton did not primarily direct this picture, but it has his look all around it.

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)

(Dir: Tim Burton)

Awarded Best Achievement in Art Direction (2008 Academy Awards)

Nominated for Best Actor (Johnny Depp) and Best Costume Design (2008 Academy Awards)

Now, Tim Burton did direct this feature, based on the musical theater production from Stephen Sondheim and Hugh Wheeler. It tells the tale Sweeney Todd (Depp) and his slow descent into madness following the loss of his wife and child. He decides to hone his skills as a barber in order to lure men into his home and murder them before sending the bodies to Mrs. Lovett (Helena Bonham Carter) to make into meat pies. His main target is Judge Turpin (Alan Rickman), the man behind the inciting treachery. This movie was released right at the time where Tim Burton wasn’t really holding my love, but I was in a musical renaissance where musicals were big for me. Maybe it was the emotional pain of youth, but I had to see this movie. I loved it, and it was one of my favorite movies from 2007, which was a pretty great year for movies already.

Little Shop of Horrors (1986)

(Dir: Frank Oz)

Nominated for Best Visual Effects and Best Original Song (“Mean Green Mother from Outer Space) (1987 Academy Awards)

Another fan and critical favorite is this 80s classic, which has an interesting backstory. I actually studied this movie in college and it holds a special spot in my heart. So, it is based on a stage musical which in turn is based on a Roger Corman anti-classic B-movie from 1960. It stars Rick Moranis as Seymour Krelborn, an unlucky slumper who comes across a very unusual plant while walking the back streets of New York City during a “Total Eclipse of the Sun!” and decides to name it Audrey II after the woman he loves (played by Ellen Greene). Things get complicated when he finds that Audrey II talks and only enjoys blood and flesh. Morbid, campy and all things terrific, this is a movie that I have to watch regularly and I dare you to watch it and try not to sing.

Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008)

(Dir: Darren Lynn Bousman)

I highly recommend this one to anyone who is curious about The Devil’s Carnival or someone who has already seen it and needs to wash the taste out. Repo! is set in the future where the one thing on everyone’s mind is surgery: make yourself better, look hotter, and live longer. Shilo (Alexa Vega) is stuck with a blood disease which is slowly killing her, and her relationship with her father (Anthony Stewart Head) is dying from his wanting to protect her from further harm. But father has secrets of his own and Shilo won’t follow his directions any longer, as she gets more and more into the mystery surrounding the death of her mother Marni. A gruesome and violent rock opera, Repo! is an addiction all its own, and features Anthony Stewart Head belting out the music in some his most powerful work to date.

The Rocky Horror Picture Shown (1975)

(Dir: Jim Sharman)

Celebrating its 40th Anniversary next year, The Rocky Horror Picture Show is a film that everyone needs to see, though most picture will not like or understand it. The film is a send-up to the horror films of back in the day, a campy but lovable triumph of fun and music, and also a satire of many heavy themes about politics and gender and sex and, well, the movie is about so many things that it’s hard not to take something new away every time you see it. My advice, watch this movie once in your home, then head to a midnight shadow cast (you’ll learn more when you go), preferably on Halloween. I have seen The Rocky Horror Picture Show Live for the past seven years in Grand Forks, North Dakota, and if able, this year will be number eight.

Take-aways:

All five films here are winners, and I suggest them to you for your Halloween pleasure. Little Shop goes together well with Rocky Horror, as do Sweeney Todd and Repo!, and will make for a grand marathoning. Happy singing!

For more 31 Days of Horror, click here.

October 2, 2014 0

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (2013)

Director: Ben Stiller

Cast: Ben Stiller, Kristen Wiig, Shirley MacLaine, Adam Scott, Kathryn Hahn, Sean Penn

Screenplay: Steve Conrad

114 mins. Rated PG for some crude comments, language and action violence.

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty is one of those movies that will divide critics and audiences alike. Some will walk out with a new view on life. Some will walk out wondering what the hell they just sat through. Me, I lie somewhere in the middle. I admire a lot of what director/star Ben Stiller was trying to do with the film. Some of it worked and some of it didn’t.

The Secret Life tells the story of Walter Mitty, a Life Magazine worker with a very boring life, who dreams of something more. Pretty standard. Walter daydreams…a lot. He is charged with finding a missing frame from a roll of film by Sean O’Connell, a famous professional photographer who shares an odd bond with Walter. This causes the daydreams of Mitty to begin to take form as he embarks on a miraculous journey of self-discovery.

I would say that the only issue I found with the somewhat generic plot would by the motivation of lead character Walter. What about today? Why, today, does he choose to take on such an insane journey? We never really find out completely.

The performances from the lead cast are pretty solid. Kristen Wiig plays the muse, Cheryl Melhoff, a fellow Life employee who assists him in his search. Adam Scott plays our resident ass, Ted Hendricks, Walter’s new boss. Sean Penn is truly a presence in his near-cameo as Sean O’Connell. He makes the entire film affirming and enjoyable.

The cinematography is a step up from previous Ben Stiller films. I’ve always found him to be a very capable director. The film is edited together nicely. The music actually works even though I didn’t think it would.Really, there are a few times when Stiller’s attempts at creating a visual piece fall flat. There is a moment that works early in the film where a Life Magazine mantra is displayed in the background as Walter is on his journey. That worked for me. Then, there is a scene where the text messages he receives from Cheryl are displayed in the side of a mountainous forest. That didn’t work for me.

The film has its hits. It has its misses. Go see it, and see for yourself. It may work for you, it may not.

3.5/5

-Kyle A. Goethe

July 21, 2014 2

X-Men (2000)

Director: Bryan Singer

Cast: Patrick Stewart, Hugh Jackman, Ian McKellan, Halle Berry, Famke Janssen, James Marsden, Bruce Davison, Rebecca Romijn, Ray Park, Anna Paquin

Screenplay: David Hayter

104 mins. Rated PG-13 for sci-fi action violence.

This is where it all begins. Remember when you saw Spider-Man or Batman Begins or even Iron Man. The Modern Superhero Revolution. It all started 14 years ago when Bryan Singer brought together a star-studded cast and a great script from David Hayter.

X-Men follows Logan (Wolverine) and Marie (Rogue), two lost souls in the near-future, as they team up with Professor X and his heroic team of mutants to stop Magneto from turning human beings into mutants like him. It is a more complex story than I originally expected, with a nice amount of twists and turns.

This cast is one of the main reasons that this film not only succeeded, but also developed the superhero genre into more than cheese. We have Hugh Jackman in his first portrayal as Wolverine, a character who be a staple on the franchise and appear in every installment. Logan is a complex character, and Jackman gets to flex those claws a lot more in later installments, but this is a nice introduction to the character. We get to see the softness in his relationship with Rogue (Anna Paquin, TV’s True Blood, The Piano). We also get a nice strong turn from Halle Berry (Cloud Atlas, The Call), still somewhat early in her career (we are talking pre-Bond girl Berry here), as Storm.

Nice work should go to Famke Janssen and James Marsden as Jean Grey and Cyclops, respectively. Their relationship in this film offers some conflict to be mined, and Marsden is portraying Cyclops for crying out loud, not an easy sell, as the character could have just come off as silly.

All these able performances are under the powerhouse work of Bromance buddies Patrick Stewart (TV’s Star Trek: The Next Generation, Ice Age: Continental Drift) and Ian McKellan (The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Stardust). These two classically-trained actors bring such depth to the characters of Professor X and Magneto. They carry the film and up the ante for future comic book adaptations.

The soundtrack in this film is absolutely iconic now. I find myself humming it and getting pumped up at the same time, very nice work.

The special effects do seem a bit dated, but there isn’t much to be done about that.

This is a great start to a franchise and every single superhero movie since owes something to Bryan Singer’s incredible saga. You really feel like you know the characters from this original outing alone. Easily one of the most impressive superhero blockbusters of recent memory.

4/5

-Kyle A. Goethe

For my review of X-Men Origins: Wolverine, click here.

For my review of X-Men: First Class, click here.

For my review of The Wolverine, click here.

June 20, 2014 20